Divination

Hello, everyone. Welcome to my free divination sessions.
*places crystal ball on desk*
Oh, dear, dear. I sense a grave disaster heading towards us. No one will escape unscathed.
If you are unsure of your path, contact me, and we shall see where you belong...

Miss Trelawney? Which staff member gave you permission to start these little... sessions? Because, frankly, we like to... discourage... the making of clubs that have not been authorised as proper and useful.
Twenty points from whatever house you're in. Hufflepuff, is it? *raises eyebrow* Well, then, the Hat must have made a mistake. It's not the first time...
Anyway, I shall be informing my fellow staff of these sessions.
We will be watching.